Indivisible by Two

Apparently the trend in Indian schools nowadays is to split twins into different sections. Mandatorily.

Apparently this has been the trend in the US for the past so many years and psychologists are now questioning the wisdom of this and some states are even reversing their policy.

The rationale for separating twins is that they need to develop as individuals and this can only happen if they are kept physically away from each other.

I have strong feelings on this matter, so I’m just going to say up front: what crap! What utter nonsense!

Twins will develop individually, they will develop their own personalities ANYWAY. The time will come when they will find their own niches and make their own paths. It might be sooner for some and later for others, but, apart from a small minority of maladjusted twins, most twins will cut their umbilical cords with each other to some extent at some point. Meanwhile, if they have an extra special bond, if they can provide each other comfort, support, strength, why should society at large try to take that away from them? What right have we? Just because we unlucky singletons, even when we have siblings, don’t have twins, we want to deny twins the pleasure of being twins???

I don’t say, either, that twins must always be kept in the same section. Maybe for some twins it actually works better to separate them. Maybe it works one way for some years and then the other way. I don’t think one size fits all.

What I say is, if the kids are old enough, let them say whether they want to be together or not. Trust them on that. And if they aren’t old enough, let the parents decide. Or at least let them decide in collaboration with the teachers. This is not something parents and teachers need to be at loggerheads about – they both want the same things. They want the kids to be happy, comfortable, and secure. I don’t at all believe that if being together helps them be that, then it is a bad thing because they will not be able to face the world individually. Of course they will – but that comes later. They might even end up being more secure and confident due to the early support and strength they get from each other.

This is a matter I feel strongly enough about that I would reject a school that forces twins to split, no matter how good the school might otherwise be. I hope I never have to see the twins forcibly separated, by school or anything else. They will go their own ways when they want to – until then, I hope they always have each other.

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4 thoughts on “Indivisible by Two

  1. mumukshu

    Gosh, I didnt know about this requirement to separate twins. I agree with you. Its terrible. Whats that saying ‘what god has joined together let no man separate’. Dont know if its in the right context…

    Reply
  2. poupee97

    Hi Mumukshu, Nice to see you here.

    Ummm… that bit about what god has joined together… that’s to do with marriage. And it gets broken up all the time, you know? 🙂 I hope the bond between twins has more sanctity than that.

    Reply
  3. Sadia

    I’m lucky to live in a state (a U.S. one, that is) that recently passed a law putting such decisions in the hands of the parents. A friend of mine who is a teacher said that her school’s policy, prior to the new legislation, to separate twins was based on the assumption that teachers wouldn’t be able to tell identical twins apart. Well, thus far, my girls’ teachers have had no trouble in that arena!

    We may decide to separate our girls into different classes at some point, but certainly not in the near future. It will depend on their preference, academic performance, and developing personalities. For right now, being together is the best thing. They don’t necessarily spend a lot of time together, but the shared experiences and expectations are important, and they’re a lot more confident knowing that Sissy is somewhere in the room. A quarter of their friends call them both Melody, another quarter call them both Jessica, and half have it right, but that’s just life as a twin.

    Reply
  4. poupee97

    Sadia: That’s even more ridiculous. Anybody can tell identical twins apart after you’ve known them well for a while. Besides, wouldn’t you then have to put them in different schools, so that they don’t get mixed up in the playground or whatever? Absurd. As for being called by each other’s names, I don’t know how much the twins themselves mind, so why should anyone else? Personally, I even think it would be quite fun to lead people on that way. But that’s just me.

    Reply

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